Well...
It's been way too long since we have added to this blog.
Maybe a gentle reminder that we were just barely holding on...
So much so that it never even occured to us (well me, Debbie...) to write here.
You see...
Social media is tricky...
We share and see the good times... and sometimes the vulnerable times...
But rarely the hard times...
And definitely not the the times when we are confused or feel hopeless...
Our late Christmas letter is a picture of where we have been as a family for the past few years...
It is raw, and real, and hard... and amazing, and grace filled, and hope giving...
Full of miracles... that we never thought we'd need...
Grief ridden, yet HOPE FILLED and full of God's promises...
MCINDOE CHRISTMAS LETTER 2013
Dear friends and family,
Yea… I’ve been
thinking we wouldn’t write a Christmas letter this year…
It’s been a rough one… well actually two…
But something keeps nagging me… “Write the letter…”
What do I write about?
Things haven’t gone as we had planned or envisioned…
Embarrassed, Ashamed, Sad, Angry, Hopeless…
A roller coaster of emotions…
How do we write about that?
This is suppose to be a MERRY Christmas letter…
Ya know?
Yet, as I sit to write, I am remembering that Christmas is
about the birth of Christ…
(Not about me…)
And somehow – in loose association, If You Give a Moose a Muffin, by Laura Numeroff, popped into my
head… So…(stick with me here!) without
further a do…
If you give the McIndoes a
miracle (or 10)
Deb will wish they didn’t
need it… (them)
And wishing they didn’t need
a miracle (or 10)
She’ll decide they did
something terribly wrong…
And when she decides they did
something wrong
She will cry, and blame
herself (or Pete, or the children, or the lady in Kroger…)
And when she gets on that
roller coaster…
It ain’t easy, and she wishes
she knew what to do…
After awhile, she will
realize she has NO IDEA what to do
And she remembers her husband
is an amazing, faith filled man…
And he will lead her and
their family to remember and trust God’s faithfulness…
And when she remembers and
trusts God’s faithfulness
She gets up early and thinks
maybe she should write the Christmas letter after all…
And then she remembers a few
years ago
When God blessed her family
with Heidy and Andres… and a new job, and a move…
And an amazing home, and
wonderful friends… old and new…
And she starts to see the
bigger picture…
And she purposes to seek and trust God for that
“Peace that passes understanding…”
And in seeking and trusting, she receives
it!
She will think of two of her
children (Heidy and Andres)
Now living with friends two
hours away… And hold back tears..
Because “What kind of mother
is ok with her kids living with another family?”
And she will remember the
great day they just had together
And that even if they are living in different homes… They are all still a family…
She will realize… again… that
when one, or two, have never been in a
family…
And come home to a large
family…
The stakes are high, old ways
don’t work anymore, and coping is confusing…
And they all… all 10… try,
and try, and try to “Get it right…”
But “Getting it right”
doesn’t look close to anything she ever envisioned…
And it’ is hard… very hard…
And she will remember… that
this is God’s story, not hers…
And that God is being glorified…a
very “religious” term, but true non-the-less
And that His ways are not
always conventional, easy, or even acceptable to some…
And then she will sigh, and smile…
As she thinks of how thankful
she is for their dear friends in Little Rock…
Who instantly came alongside
her family, to serve…
And cook, and send scripture,
and drive kids, and host, and pray, and give, and encourage…
And their dear friends in
Searcy… And their friend’s amazing Searcy community…
Who have “Been preparing for
something big… But just didn’t know what it was…”
She will realize (again) that
Jeremiah 29:11 is true and real!
“For I know the plans I have for
you says the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you
a hope and a future!”
And when she thinks of
Jeremiah 29:11
She remembers the confusion
over the past two years with work, and school, and budgets, and parenting, and relationships
stretched, and friend’s and families’ struggles…
… And she can (almost) give
“Thanks in all circumstances!”
And when she is giving
thanks…
She remembers how God has
loved her family through people:
People at FamilyLife, in her neighborhood,
in co-op, in church, in other states…
Bosses, and friends, and acquaintances,
and people they just met…
Or don’t even know…
And she smiles and realizes
(again) that Yes! This IS God’s story!
And it’s messy, and hard, and
doesn’t fit in a nice little box, with a bow on the top…
But then again… would she
really want it to?
And when embarrassment, or
shame, or anger, or hopelessness peak in…
Deb decides to push those
away… and rest in the Truth…
There is no condemnation in
Christ Jesus…
Trust in the Lord with all
your heart and lean not on your own understanding…
I know the plans I have for
you (and those you love)…
Joy comes in the morning…
And when she “Thinks upon
these things…”
She remembers that Christmas
is about Jesus’ birth…so he could die…
So he would rise again…
So that we (collectively –
you too!) could have Life… and have it to the fullest!
Yes, When God gives the
McIndoes a miracle (or 10)
Deb will wish they didn’t
need it (them)!
But after that… she’ll trust
in God’s plan, provision and faithfulness…
Even, and especially, if it’s
messy, and hard, and doesn’t come in a nice little box
With a bow on the top…
