Resting -

As I type I am sitting outside on a blanket in the little yard of our cottage. There is a fence around the cottage, and the entrance to the yard is a gate, taller then me, covered by a small roof. The inside of the fence is lined with different shades of purple flowers… deep purple, violet, white with the tips purple, some red flowers and some deep dark pink flowers. (I was going to say magenta, but don’t think I know how to spell it!)

I have been here most of the day. Today has been a true respite. The most special part for me though is not the beauty, the flowers, the cool breeze, the trees, or the birds singing. The most special part for me is this sweet young lady who has been next to me on the blanket all day.

This morning I pulled a rocking chair outside and Heidy wanted one too, so I grabbed the other one for her. We sat quietly and read for a bit. Then I grabbed a blanket and put it in the shade to rest and read my bible. Heidy followed me, went back inside for a minute and came back with two pillows and a book. She was smiling and peaceful and all she said was “Fun!” as she plopped beside me. It is just after lunch right now, and I am sitting on the blanket typing and she is beside me with a few toys.

I think it is fair to say I didn’t think this moment would come. This peaceful… it’s gonna be ok kind of feeling….

It was a very, very…very… hard weekend. I just couldn’t let myself be content. I wanted to go home so desperately that when I wasn’t crying, I was trying not to cry. The tears would come…. And go…. And I would think “Good… that’s over…” I would be fine, having fun even, and the next thing you know I’d think about home, and the tears would flow. And, you know how it is…. At least for me…. First I would be crying about being home, that would usually transition into missing my dad – then I would really cry… then I would be mad b/c I was crying… so I would cry more…

I am so thankful to be here. Andres and Hiedy played all week end with the girls here. They painted and went to the park and watched movies and made up games to play. I really wish I had a camera. If I did I would of snapped a picture of Andres with face cream all over his face…. Smiling real big!

I reached out to a handful of friends and they all sent me back scripture and encouragement. They told me to rest and enjoy being here. They told me the Lord has good things for me/us here, and to… well… basically to get a grip! So today… after another big hard cry, and after talking to Carol, our amazing friend who assured me she has my family covered… I just let myself be here, and I just let myself feel loved. And I just rested in the shade in the cool of the day. I imagine the tears will come again, but I think/hope I am on the other side of the abys. Maybe next time they won’t be desperate tears… maybe they will be healing tears…. Or happy tears…!

Well… back to Heidy and Andres….

Last night Heidy didn’t feel good. I have never seen her sick. She came to me as I was skyping home and crawled up on the table I sitting at and layed down and looked at me with the most pitiful eyes. She was shivering and she was trying not to cry. I quickly got off of Skype and we came home. I wrapped her in blankets and snuggled with her. After a bit, still shivering she looks at me and says….”Madre… Uno?” I couldn’t believe it! So we played one game of Uno, one of Skip Bo and one game of Yahtzee. She was shivering the whole time. She slept in this morning. I heard her stirring and went in to rest with her. She was so quite.

I just kept wondering how she was cared for in the foster homes when she was sick. I wonder if anyone ever just snuggled with her, or held her, or was cozy with her.

You know… this language barrier is a good thing sometimes. If I could of communicated with words to her I would have. As it was… we were both just quiet and cozy and I rubbed her back… for a long time… each in our own quiet thought..


And Andres….

I must admit… I was TOTALLY shocked and feel very honored and loved….

As you know… our potty has been backed up… for 5 days! They were able to fix it yesterday. Yeeaa!! Last night I realized that it really, really needed to be scrubbed. I told Hiedy and Andres I was sorry and that I would take care of it today. So…. I was kind of avoiding it… really wishing Pete were here…. But knowing I had to suck it up and do the gross work. In I went…

And…

The potty was sparkling! I was absolutely shocked. I cried out… “Who cleaned the potty?”

And Andres popped around the corner with a BIG smile and said “I did!” (Yup, in english even!)


Thank you to ALL who are praying, encouraging, cooking for, and serving our family. Please know that you are participating - literally...in rescuing these 2 sweet children we will soon be able to call our son and daughter.

Muchos Amor –
Much Love –
Deb